Bs win

• 4th line played a complete game as the B's sunk the Islanders, 3-2
• Who is this Daniel Paille? The 4th line was possessed the other night, their 1st period performance was one of the best all season. Getting pucks deep and wearing down the opposition. That's the shit we need for the playoffs.
• That Grabner can skate, huh?
• We were on "Gillies Alert" everytime he had a shift - he could have attacked Krejci or Bergeron and killed our playoff hopes.
• Today the B's coasted to a 3-1 win vs. the Senators. The Sens got nothing.
• Fight today, Horton vs. Zack Smith. Smith can throw. Horton pretty much got beat, but kept swinging away. Horton makes these huge, slow punches, like Lincecum windups. But if they ever land, it's ova.
• Highlight reel goal by Peverley. Kinda this self-pass thing off the boards, got his own pass there, cut to the center and backhanded it in. I taught him how to skate.
  
• Local boy and budding Bruin killer Bobby Butler scored. A guy in my row made sure to let everyone around us know that he & Butler were buds and hung out, played, etc.
• A brief "we want the Cup" chant started towards the end of the game. A bit premature for that.
• Recchi just keeps passing milestones with each game he plays. Today, he passed Chris Chelios for 4th all-time in games played. Chris Chelios can lick my balls.
• Bulldogs going for it all tonight in the Frozen Four Final vs. Michigan. The 'dogs have a power play to behold. Quoth a 311 member, "I see that power play, I get instant wood."
• McQuaid is, like, a flannel shirt and a Subaru away from being the Bruins first lesbian hockey player or something. His "cuts for a cause" buzz cut mullet hairdo is something else I tell ya.
• Paille! with another goal! Amazing pass from Soupy and Paille crashing the net with his stick on the ice, can't argue with any of that. Where is this coming from?
  

B's Collapse

So the B's collapsed under the weight of their own bullshit last night, losing to the Rangers in the 3rd period, 5-3.

• Ryan Callahan got a broken ankle from a Chara slapshot.
• Dirty goal from Paille, crashing the net. He's picked up his game of late. This morning's T&R had some spieling between the hosts and Haggs there, Haggs was thinking that Paille's the only one who actually played a 60 minute game last night, while everyone loafed after getting the 3-0 lead. Shit, I thought it was "game over", especially given the fact that the Rangers can't score. Paille pisses me off, but I can say he's at least trying. Someone else, I forget who, brought up the point that Seguin is too friggin scared to play dirty in the corners. Ryder and Paille can do the dirty work in the corners. I dunno. Paille can kill penalties, too. I'm thinking if the series is tied, 2-2, you won't see Seguin in the lineup. But if we're up 3-0 (ha) or down 0-3, you'll see Seguin in there to fool around.
  
• Time to fire Cload. 311'ers were noting over email today that if the B's play the Caps in the 2nd round, it's pretty much Boudreau vs. Cload, since both coaches will be sacked if their respective teams do not advance beyond that round.
  
• Wait. Why are you reading this blog? You should be at Days of Y'orr, which has more creative photoshops in 1 post than I could compose in 1 year.

Metaphor for B's collapse. Enjoy.

B's win, 3-2

See what I did there? I was working some jedi mind-shit when I called out Ryder's shootout skillz the other day. And today he scores the winning goal on a penalty shot.

• Really, though, not a good game. The return of Wheels (missed the net on a 2-on-1 breakaway) and Stuart did not yield much. Stuey got a bigger ovation than Wheels. Wheels managed to stay onside for his new club.
• To no one's surprise, Marchand won the 7th player. Was a few years ago when the winner used to be able to give a speech - I remember Raycroft thanking his girlfriend or something and all the chicks in the crowd booed that.
• Paille, actually showing some finish for once to go with his speed, scoring a nice shorthanded goal after Bogosian coughed it up at the goal line.
• Hnidy's first game back. Didn't do terrible, I think he had 3 shots in about 14 minutes of play.
• Rask looked retahded on the Bufflin (too lazy to spell...) goal. Rebound up and over his head, down his back. Derrrrrr.
• Oh yeah, we clinched the NE Division title.

B's Lose in SO, 4-3

Someone please put Toronto out of their misery, huh? The Bruins could have done some good by pounding this team down, stepping on their neck in order to sweeten that draft pick. But, the B's are laying down now that the 3rd seed is all but wrapped up.

• HOLY SHIT, if I have to see Cload drop the ball when it comes to shooters in the shoot-out, I'm gonna freak. Ryder is NOT shootout material, not when a hack like me can figure out that, if he even gets it on net at all, he's going low glove. "Hands guys", Cload - send Krejci, Bergeron, and Seguin EVERY TIME. Cload is as soft as puppy shit when it comes to Ryder.
• Seguin, pushing around Luke Schenn in a scrum. Better pick on someone smaller, kid. Schenn would ruin you. But at least Seguin's pretending to get pissed.
  
• Kessel, throwing a punch at Marchand. Oh, that woulda been good. According to the Herald, Marchand did a fake golf swing in front of the TOR bench. I missed it. But that's an awesome move. Kessel got a lot of boos last night, but no "Kessel sucks" chants.
• No Horton/Phaneuf III tonight. They really hate each other, it's awesome.
  
• Yeah, losing to the Rangers 1-0 was lame - I dodged the game to go skiing (Dumont Cup, right, where the announcer makes up the moves the freestylers do on the spot, I swear, right, "oh, he just did a fakie back-side 1260 spongecake with a dab of cool whip". shutthefuckup, asswipe.) Lundqvist OWNS the B's, so I'm not terribly looking forward to that matchup in the playoffs.
• Holy shit, the organist kicked into "Brass Bonanza" the other night, I almost hurled. It's like a mating call for the male Whaler fan when he seeks the companionship of basement-dwelling, Crisco-eatin' female Whaler fans.
  
• The 3-0 win by the B's over the B'hawks had to be possibly the most complete win I've witnessed all season, maybe even better than the pee-pee smackin' the B's gave the Habs a week earlier. I dunno. It was just a damn fine game.
  
• Note that Resident NHL Commie Andrew Ference follows Arsenal. As we all know, futbol is for commies. (caveat emptor, LGT American Thinker. Wear a rubba.)
• Dennis Wideman has a hematoma.
• Stan Jonathan at the game last night. The original #17 barely got a standing ovation, as the pink hats in the crowd said "who?" in between mugging for the jumbotron and dicking around with their iphones. Pound-for-pound, one of the toughest dudes to play for the B's, I can't embed this video enough onto this blog. Here he is, destroying Pierre Bouchard's face. Poetry.
  

Ok, wow

Getting stuck at work for a B's/Habs home game is bad enough. Why did I have to miss this one? I was lucky enough to attend the 8-6, 187 PIM, Iron League like battle last month. Last night, through the TV, that building sounded like it was going to fall down. Remember when the NHL series on Sega Genesis used to show you the highest decibel attained for the crowd? I would love to see that statistic or even an average decibel level from last night. It sounded louder than a Slipknot concert. Did it feel great to beat the Habs to a bloody pulp? Wasn't it wonderful to watch the Pea Soup Eaters legs turn to rubber halfway through the third and look like a typical Bruins team as the real B's skated circles around them? Could Jack Edwards ask for a better birthday present? Yes, yes, and no.

BUT.......as I am a typical New England sports fan, here's my real spin on this game. We're in trouble. If the B's/Habs match up does happen in the playoffs, the B's and their fans are screwed again. Those of you in the building last night, I have to think you just watched the Bruins win their Stanley Cup. The mentality of this team (i.e. we made the second round of the playoffs two years in a row!!) is akin to bringing home a C+ to your parents and asking them to hang it on the fridge. They will ride this win for at least two weeks, thinking they have the affection of Boston fans because, hey, we beat Montreal and their stupid 911 abusing fans. Prove me wrong Bruins.

God I hope I'm wrong and this is the spring board they need to get their sh*t together for a playoff run that would cost me a crap ton of money. Here's to hoping that my tax return is spoken for this April/May/June.

B's win

The B's woke up from their slumber and beat the Devils, 4-1.

• Goals by Lootch, Recchi (en), Chara, Thornton. Since Chara knocked out Pacioretty, he has been on a bit of a scoring tear. Okay, I just checked. Maybe not. 2-5-7 +4 totals in the last 7 games.
• Thought we were in for another Devils/B's snoozer, you know, with teams combining for 25 shots the entire game. Not to be had, as the Devils outshot the B's something like 503 to 3 in the 1st period. Most of the Devils shots did not produce rebounds, Thomas just gobbled them up and got faceoffs.
• BUT we finally scored a PP goal, now we're 2 for our last, what, 4,905. Lootch set up Chara with a nice pass. Bergeron also made a bit of a circus pass to Lootch for Lootch's goal, making the pass against his own momentum.
  
• Mahk Recchi, stirring the shitstorm yesterday on Felga & Mazz. (Mazz is not funny, btw. He is the worst of typical nerdboy hangers-on. Never good enough to start for the high school football team (or even make the team), he decided to write about it so he could get in close on the action, get close to the players. sycophant, he is. That's what so weird about sportswriters these days - trying to be as big as the players themselves. It reminds me of Lester Bangs and how he make rock 'n roll journalism better than rock 'n roll itself at times. HE was the rock star, not the clown he was writing about. The difference being that Bangs is good and Mazz, et al. are less than good. Also, ESPN really sucks. Really, who GIVES A SHIT about college ball??? Just that d-bag in your office who still reads Bill Simmons (and not ironically, either) and still talks about his bracket. Look, no one cares about the bracket unless they're in the money and the only reason they're in the money is pure luck. "gee I really thought State University of Basketweaving was gonna beat CU of North Texas". College hoops and College football are hugely retarded. But I did fill out my frozen four bracket with NDAK going all the way.) What was I talking about before going on some convoluted, incomprehensible, baseless rant? oh yeah. Recchin ball alleged that the Habs exaggerated Pacioretty's (sick of typing that name) injury in order to get Chara suspended. Yeah, probably their abilities for diving/embellishment extend right up from the ice to ownership & management.
• I don't think there will be any funny stuff tonight. Maybe 1 or 2 fights or something, but it'll be closely officiated (first four penalties on the B's, easy) with the B's being shorthanded most of the game.
  

B's Lose

The B's are something like 1-100-3 in the past 7 games and it's time to hit the panic button. Remember in 2007, when the Devils sacked Julien with a week left to the regular season, despite a first place standing, because they felt that he didn't have the team ready for the playoffs?

• Horton & Phaneuf simply hate each other. Horton was ready to kill him in the 3rd period tonight. They fought, Phaneuf hid behind his visor, nothing much came of it.
• Seguin with 5 shots tonight, robbed twice by Reima. Seguin had a jump in his step tonight but still doesn't play the body or fight hard enough for pucks.
• Garbage time (19.8 seconds left) goal by Paille (been calling him "Pie-nay" instead of "Pie-yay" at the games since we don't want him out there), time for everyone to pick him up on your fantasy teams.
  
• Quaider did a pylon impression on the Schenn goal, but redeemed himself with a hustle goal a few minutes later. Then the game pretty much went awful from there as Reima stopped everything that was shot at him and the Leafs buried every chance that came their way.

Here's McQuaid on the Schenn goal.

• Tim Thomas is rockin' some serious mustache there.