HORRIBLE

Feel free to hit the panic button now. This season's quickly going down the tubes.

Horrible.

That's right. I go to NHL.com to, I dunno, check stuff out, and I'm greeted by Phil Kessel, leading the league in points, goals, and plus-minus.

Also, the Bruins beat the Blackhawks. Hail Seguin & Thomas; rest of the team isn't worth our time yet.

B's get smoked

No. The other Bruins.

• Last night, took in a P-Bruins game with Row 12, where they got shellacked by the Manchester Monarchs, 7-1. It wasn't that bad of a game, just wanted to see some violence, seeing as how our local team has decided to not really play with much passion. Well, the farm club kind of suffers from this as well. I will say the boards are loud at "The Dunk", and that plexiglas sounds real brittle as each slap shot brings with it the possibility of the glass shattering. Time to rebuild The Dunk, yah? Lots of crotchfruit there as well, going mad batshit over the SpongeBob Squarepants theme.
• Look, Joe Corvo kind of sucks. Actually, not kind of. He just sucks...he's making me wish for the days of Kaberle. He constantly gets burned out there...and that booming shot that I thought we were getting really hasn't appeared. Too often has 311 commented, "oh, Corvo just got bitched on that play"... Then again, the rest of the team hasn't shown up yet either. Also, Corvo looks like Judge Doom from Roger Rabbit, y'know, after he goes nuts and attacked Roger with the cartoon saw & cartoon sledgehammer. What, you think I'm kidding?

• Lootch & Horton are playing "like they've already won the Cup this year". Lootch shanked an easy open net vs. Colorado. Made a bad team look good that night. I'm telling ya, Lootch is gotta get about 9 goals this season, probably 8 of them empty-netters.
  
• No fighting majors yet. hmmmm.
• Looks like only Seguin & Marchand have shown up this year so far. How much longer until we get the team talking about how they're "squeezing their sticks too hard" in trying to score?
• So we got the Blackhawks tonight at 8:30pm. Predicting another Bruins loss here, probably 5-2 or something.
  

B's win

Opening night w/ the banner raising was pretty cool. The B's looked out of step, though.

• Lootch still looks lost out there like he did in the playoffs. Not many shifts where he's skating with purpose. Just standing there waiting for something to happen. Horton still looks a bit out of sorts, too. Hopefully just early season cobwebs.
• Marchand & Seguin, however, have been flying all over the ice. Seguin's skating with the confidence of someone who has had their ice time increased from say 10 minutes a game to about 18-20 minutes a game.
• Don't look now, but Phil Kessel is leading the league in goals and points. It's still early, but enough to make you taste the bile when you check out the league leaders page on NHL.com.
• Bruins made their probable final public appearance with the Cup yesterday as they took it to Gillette Stadium to pump up the crowd and the Patriots. Horton sprayed some Garden rink love on to the logo at midfield. The Mayor was there, "unreal", he texted. Patriots won...
• Marchand performed a nice takedown of Dominic Moore. I was hoping it would come to blows, with Marchand pounding Moore's face right into the rink surface. Alas, 'twas not to be. Linesmen stepped in and prevented Marchand from tenderizing Moore's face with his fists.
  
• How effin sweet was that pass from Jesus Seguin to Marchand for Marchand's 1st goal of the season. Then Marchand beat Bryzgalov with a nice backhand.
• Lots of backhand looks vs. TB. "The backhand died with the retirement of Paul Kariya", noted one 311'er.
  

B's beat Habs in Pre-season - YES it matters

The Bruins continued their recent domination over the Habs by clubbing them over the head, 7-3 in Halifax and then winning in Montreal, um.....3-1 was it?
Of course, didn't see either game, heard both on the radio. Well, I attempted to, fell asleep both times during the 2nd intermission. Last night, I was watching the Sox collapse live on tv with the volume down while the Sportshub played on the laptop.
Did I already complain already about the horseshit the other night with the LOGE starting the wave??? That is some extreme horseshit right there. What's next, Sweet Caroline during the 2nd commercial break of the 3rd period?
Thursday night is against zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz Ottawa.

B's win, 6-3

Bruins beat the Islanders last night, 6-3.

• WHO in my section had the nacho cheese that smelled like feet?
• Last night's studs: Peverley had about 4 goals and 8 assists, had a lot of spring to his step, easily skated around the whodat Islander defensemen. Good stuff. Brad Marchand had plenty of looks and was skating around everyone after awhile. After the B's went ahead, it kind of became garbage time then...the Islanders just started to look like your father's thursday midnight beer league hockey.
• Last night's duds: Tim Thomas had some nice saves and 1 goal he had no chance on, but 3 goals on 13 shots doesn't look so hot. Lucic looked slow & lost. I really think Lootch is going to have an off-year. Like, epic awful, say 10 goals, 4th line duty, everything like that. Plus, he recently was the subject of a Margery Eagan "tsk tsk" article in the Herald the other day. Also, anyone who does the "do you know who I am" thing for real has it coming to them.
  
• Some dude tried to beat up Krejci last night, Krejci turtled kind of to avoid injury, then I heard something about the guy getting 2 minutes for instigating with a visor on, which is a penalty I've not heard before.
• WHO in my section keeps rippin' ass?
• Matt Kalman is everywhere. If there's someone in the media who has cashed in on the B's success, it's this guy. Every day, he writes an article on each player that pops up somewhere. It's either great hustle or a little scary. Personally, I think he's obsessed, but he's getting paid, so what do I know. I half-ass this blog for free. It's less than half-ass - a fraction of half-ass. It's, like, eighth-ass.
  
• People from Halifax, NS are called "Haligonians"
• Ryan Spooner, going back to the OHL.

Horrible

• Today, a group of professional hockey players in the KHL died in a plane crash. Among the victims were sniper Pavol Demitra and former Bruin Brad McCrimmon. Probert, Boogaard, Belak, and now this. What is with this freakish NHL curse?
  
• Ference had the Cup this past weekend. Of course, Ference is the commie Bruin, so it's fitting that he gets the Cup on Labor Day. Workers of the world, unite! Of course, he celebrates by paying homage to Mao by riding his bike all over town...then organized a flash mob of people wearing the same shirt to march down the street, crowding around him. Totalitarianism, anyone? All that was missing was a huge missile for the crowd to walk along, maybe a building-sized picture of Ference's profile.
  
• Are we gonna sign Marchand, or what?
• Just warming up, kids. We raise the banner in 4 weeks. We start training camp in 8 days. And hopefully, the blog posts will improve.