B's Trades

Today the B's made some trades.

• Brian Rolston, #12 makes his way back to Boston. I don't know why we didn't try to claim him off waivers, but anyway. I remember Rolston for his penalty-killing skillz and his slapshot. He's 39 now. His walker will come in handy during line brawls, he'll throw it at the players. Trade Deadline Rating: 2.5 out of 5 Recchis
• Mike Mottau, local boy, BC or BU hero to the 5 people in this state who give a shit about that stuff. He's in his early/mid-30's and I don't know why we got him (depth). I would have preferred a different local guy for a d-man, say, y'know, Keith Yandle, or something. Also, this trade had me hoping that Corvo was gone, but when TSN finally posted it and that we traded Vinny Riendeau, I was crestfallen. Trade Deadline Rating: 2.5 out of 5 Recchis
  
• Greg Zanon, a stout d-man from the Wild. Originally drafted by Ottawa (hmmm...). 5-11, blocks more shots than (joke). Looks like this year's answer to Bruins great Allen Pedersen. Can't have enough thick, experienced, stay-at-home d-men during the playoffs; basically Seidenberg-lite. Trade Deadline Rating: 3 out of 5 Recchis
  

Drafter's Remorse

I can't let this go. Here is a list of some of the players selected in the 2007 draft AFTER Zach Hamill (8th pick overall). I remember when he was drafted, they compared his game to Joe Sakic's. Wow.

Logan Couture, Brandon Sutter, Lars Eller, Kevin Shattenkirk, Max Pacioretty, David Perron, P.K. Subban, T.J. Galiardi, Wayne Simmonds, Jamie Benn. That's right, Jamie fuckin' Benn in the friggin 5th round. Woulda, shoulda, coulda. I'm just saying.

Trade Corvo & Hamill

The Bruins were victimized by crummy officiating and their own lack of finish, losing to the Penguins, 2-1 today.

• the Zach/Dorothy Hamill experiment needs to come to an end soon. Past two games he's tried to show a little more jam in his game, but he's plays a small game and is not heavy on the puck. He's like Krejci, minus everything.
  
• the Joe Corvo experiment needs to come to an end now. He needs to be euthanized. He's useless at the point, so useless that we're using Pevs at the point, and that's apparently an upgrade from Corv-blow. Sure, he scored today, but that was all Marchand getting into MAF's way.
• speaking of Marc-Andre Fleury - what's up with this guy? Everyone thinks he's hot shit, and the only reason he's good is because he plays for the Penguins. How many games has he stolen for them? Probably zero. Ever hear that thing from 24/7 when he tries to talk shit to the players? No one sounds tough speaking french or with a french accent. It's like Phil Jackson. Is he really that good a coach, or just happened to coach 2 of the best players to play in the NBA (Kobe & Jordan).
• Bruins are now 1-2-0 since Thomas-gate.
• oh, okay, Deryk Engelland elbows Krejci high, gets no call while Krejci is on one knee trying to collect his bearings, but Peverley gets called for a "slash" on Malkin 8 seconds later.
• Ben-wa Balls Pouliot has been returning to his former self, probably because of the Horton injury - plus he has to skate with Hamill, which would bring down even Gretzky's game.
• a fair amount of Penguins fans in the crowd - hard to spot them because of similar colors, but they all had their frontrunner jerseys on (Crosby), plus some of them defiantly wearing the Pittsburgh Steelers garb, too.
• Ironic that the B's played the Whale on Wednesday - February 2 - not many Whaler fans in the building that game, most saw their shadow in the morning and then ran back into their basements - 6 more weeks of winter.
  

Corvo-based Rage

B's have lost 2 straight, with, as the Globe reported, suckbag Joe Corvo being on the ice for the last 3 goals let up.

• Weird to see Joe Corvo drop 'em vs. Joey Crabb. Crabb hid behind his visor and Corvo wanted nothing to do with the fight. Corvo only fights chicks anyway. Or chicks with dicks, depending on whose story you believe.
• The B's need more of that scary puck possession game like they played against Toronto, holding it into the zone for 2 minutes while the Marlies tried to figure out what's going on.
  
• The Joe Corvo Suck Express has left the station, get on board with it - Fluto & Friends have been shitting on him, as they should have. Remember, 311 knew Corvo sucked right away.
• Speaking of sucky, underperforming defensemen, Kaberle was traded to the Habs, which makes it more appropriate for us to boo him with impunity.
• Paille was knocked out by Krys Barch with a weird check the other night. Soup & Thornton both tossed their mitts and Thornton ended up doing the dirty work. Boychuk had to take his medicine vs. Jack Skille and pretty much won that fight. Boyfuck wears a visor though...Paille is concussed and Caron will play vs. the Blue Jackets.
  
• I heard "Shakedown Street" on the organ during intermission last week, what is up with that? That album cover mesmerized me for hours as a kid.
• Fan of the game - have I complained about this yet? where some parent thrusts their month-old toddler in front of the camera so it can win a free pizza that it can't even yet? My guess is the Ice Chicks got one of them weedwacker blenders like you see at Buffett shows, puree the pizza, and spoon-force-feed the kid. So anyone wanting a free Pizzeria Uno pizza, bring your toddler kid to the game, have it do something innocent & kidlike, crowd goes "awwww" and boom, free pizza.
• Nothing to report here with Seguingate, everyone thinks the dude is out carousing but c'mon, the plane landed at 2AM in the 'Peg, it was apparently 5 deg F out there, maybe he got shnockered in the hotel room but I don't think a gal was involved.
  

B's Keep Pounding Ass

B's won the other night in a horrendously ugly matchup w/ the Blue Jackets, 2-1 (SO).

• At the center of all things wrong in the world is none other than Bruins defenseman Joe Corvo. Every night this guy brings anywhere between 5 and 7 metric ass-tons of suckage to the rink. And not too far behind him is Kampfer. The tonnage of suckage he brings is still in its infancy, but he's done some weird things out there. Plus, he just gets torched all the time.
  
• Speaking of Kampfer, you know this guy's a trouble magnet, right? Univ of Michigan, okay, and he's been assaulted TWICE.

Kampfer delivers a clean hit and some dude takes exception. The "history" the announcers are referring to is the attack he experienced earlier in the year at the hands of some Univ of Michigan football players. Also, this

• Ben wa Pouliot finally gets off the schnide by scoring a goal. He's still got cheap Hab-its to break (stick is high a lot, some high hits; overall douchey-ness) but he is skating hard, so...
• We hit, what, 1200 posts the other night? Rang iron all night, weird how that happens. Chara almost knocked the net off its moorings, as did Horton with a wicked wrista to the crossbah.
• Zach Hamill threw a hit last week. Piped up one 311'er, "zach hamill, hitting someone in the corner. weak." And I said, "that was more Dorothy Hamill". Don't know if that was original joke, but there ya go.
• Kessel still in scoring lead - what IS this shit?
• @msavvy91 still predicting Bruins wins and goal scorers. It's a little creepy. Is there a Peterborough equivalent to Powerball? Maybe he should play...

B's Pound Ass

The B's slapped away a young Oiler team last night, 6-3.

• Joe Corvo is still on my shit list despite his 3 assist effort. Commented a 311'er, "we'd have a dangerous team....if only Joe Corvo could actually play defense."
  

• The Tyler Seguin Explosion continues with a goal and an assist last night. I hope he overtakes Phil Kessel for the league lead in goals, points, etc. because Phil's shitty mug is still all over nhl.com. It's getting to the point, especially with the way that line has been gellin' (so much so, I'm wellin') that it really looks like they can't be stopped. I mean, Seguin missed, what 2 or 3 empty nets the other night? I mean this line is sick, and they're the second line. Horton is starting to wake up and skate with more purpose (though he missed 2 gimmes last night) and Lootch is sucking less. The KHL line had one early even-strength shift last night where they had sole puck possession in the offensive zone for what felt like I dunno, a week and a half, which eventually led to the Boychuk goal.
• Who, what, huh? Mark Mowers on The Instigators, folks. The nadir of NESN programming? You decide.
  
• I went to a Hahvid Bah after the game last night. There was equations 'n shit on the walls. Everybody was regurgitatin' Gordon Wood.
  
• Speaking of Blake Wheeler, he's 0-7-7 with the Jets right now.
• You remember Rick Zombo, right? Well this former Bruin (67 games in the 90's: 4-10-14) is now the coach of the Lindenwood University hockey team, located somewhere in Missouri.
  

Misc.

• I go to the nhl.com league leaders and league pissant Phil Kessel is still leading the league in points, goals, and plus/minus. gag.
• Seriously, why are you here? Go back to Days of Y'orr.
• The other night, Chris Neil and Joe Corvo were about ready to go at it, but the linesmen broke it up. Dunno if they showed it on TV, but I got pretty excited - I wanted to see Chris Neil clobber Joe Corvo. You see, each year, Vf311 focuses it's irrational hate-death ray on a Bruin player who kind of sucks. This year, it's Joe Corvo. Check the Google - back in 2002 or so, when he was a punk with the Monarchs, he attacked some chick in a bar and had to do community service and stuff. Rumor has it, he actually attacked a tranny. I dunno, I wasn't there.
• Guy who sat next to me on Tuesday, I think he shat himself during pre-game and forgot to clean up.
• Section 322 tried to start the wave Tuesday. THERE ARE NO WAVES IN HOCKEY.
• Yes, that was Hockey LEGEND Ian Moran on The Instigators the other night. Really? Ian Moran? And I thought I spied Mark Mowers on NESN the other day, too. Mowers was Dave Lewis' cabana boy back the day when the B's kinda sucked. Those were the dark days, with Dave Scatchard and Brad Isbister.
  
• No real great analysis about the latest team play. I mean, I think they gotta push thru it and hopefully they find their way before it's too late. We'll see what happens against the Laffs in Toronto on Saturday. The Laffs are playing well for some strange reason...